February 2019 Patient of the Month

February 2019 Patient of the Month Garden State Bariatrics & Wellness Center

My whole life I have been overweight and simply went about each day existing. I knew I relied on food to comfort me and the number on the scale to define how I felt about myself. At age 19, two words forever scarred my heart and burned into my mind. On my Father's death certificate, the cause for his congestive heart failure was "morbid obesity." It stung so hard. I lost my father because of something that was a choice. I always swore I would do everything in my power to be healthy if I ever became a mom so I could be there for my children for as long as possible.

Fast forward ten years, I was a Mom but realized I didn't have an actual mechanism to "get healthy". I struggled with many diets, exercise routines for the first seven years of my daughter's life, but my mental state remained the same. I was committed to shaming myself for not doing more and wallowing in failure. I was on the same path as my Father and I knew it. I finally decided I needed help and GSBWC was the answer. I came into my first visit at 5'1"and 235 pounds.  A year and a half later I am 5'2", 129 pounds and full of self-love and acceptance of who I am.

I have immersed myself in support groups and GSBWC is always there to keep me moving forward. Hard choices are becoming easier and part of my routine. I still remain very weak in some areas. For example, there is no such thing as having one Oreo. My willpower is not there yet. My willpower may never be there. I am okay with this realization though, because instead of clinging to a package of Oreos, there is a leash waiting for me to grab off the hook to take the dogs for a walk with my daughter, or a bike beckoning me to take a ride down the street. Many memories are now on the horizon with my daughter. I have been gifted something priceless from GSBWC, and that is the chance to truly love this life that I have been given and to treasure this chance to change the date and ending on my death certificate. I cannot thank the doctors and staff at GSBWC for giving me the chance to rewrite how my daughter will remember me. I am forever grateful.

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